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Stars #15
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Stars by Psychic Augusta

Psychic Augusta has been reading the stars and casting runes since discovering her special gift at the tender age of sixteen. If any of her predictions come true for anyone, please e-mail us immediately.



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Aries
March 21 - April 20
Your flatmates are poisoning your air space. Offer to buy the next toilet roll
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Taurus
April 21 - May 21
Six of one is suddenly less than half dozen of another. It has always been this way.
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Gemini
May 22 - June 21
An out-of-body experience becomes permanent.
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Cancer
June 22 - July 22
A message from beyond arrives postage due. The universe expects you to ante up.
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Leo
July 23 - August 23
Leo the lion will roar at something on television. Time to take that short walk to oblivion. Use drink, as always.
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Virgo
August 24 - Sept 23
Beware a flame haired man carrying baggage. A friend will paint her dog gold and train it to sit still for hours.
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Libra
Sept 24 - October 23
Glands will inflate in the company of Leos. Whose glands is unclear. An old friend will berate the owner of the glands.
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Scorpio
Oct 24 - Nov 22
I see little for Scorpios this month other than a dank void of empty reflection and some weight gain.
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Sagittarius
Nov 23 - Dec 21
A coach trip of visiting evangelists will crash into your building. You and one other will be saved.
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Capricorn
Dec 22 - Jan 20
With Venus descendant, the dogs of dismay will howl at your moonbox. Update your Facebook status.
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Aquarius
Jan 21 - Feb 19
The dawning of the age of Aquarius happened a long time ago. Get over it. Move on. Nobody is interested.n age
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Pisces
Feb 20 - March 20
see Taurus
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Motoring #6
Motoring #7
Motoring #8
Motoring #9
Motoring 10
Motoring 11
Motoring 12
Motoring 13

 

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